Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
whoa...plan B gets you drunker quicker.
he just found out his girl is having a boy. he's probably googling "Ed Hardy diapers" as we speak.
i never told you how having a club foot got me laid
Still workable. Pretty sure i told her i'd eat her out in the woods.
She told me I reminded her of the fair. And she wanted to deep fry my dick and eat it.
His little brother walked in on us. Six times.
Peter invited his little brother to smoke with us and he is trying so hard to pretend he's done it before. When he saw the weed he was like "hell yeah!" and everyone got completely silent and just looked at him
Now he's trying to use the tornado warnings as an excuse to get head. Yeah, b/c THAT'S the last taste I want in my mouth b4 I die...
No, the responsible one does not yell out "lets go to iHop" at 5 in the morning to a bunch of drunk people with munchies.
I have nothing to lose. And a bunch of dick to gain.
We woke up at 7:30am. We got a 30 rack, yelled at all the freshman shackers walkin back to their dorms, played a game of beer die, and boned all before 11:00am. I found my soulmate
I really appreciate you taking the time to blur out my excessive boob cleavage for instagram
So high I legit spent 20mins in the shower just holding my tits cuz they feel bigger than normal.
We didn't have a place to have sex. So we timed the automatic car wash & spent $9 for 3 minutes and 45 secs of car sex.
Randomize
