I have a feeling we are going to become cougars together.
I swear she didn't look like that last week.
We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
I'm pretty sure I just overheard my boss call his sperm precious metal...
In the middle of switching positions, we shared a line of coke. It's was like a modern-day 'Lady and the Tramp.'
So i was told that i peed in the sink, had sex with a pillow and banged on a washer while singing idian chants
I've thrown up twice at work. Just casually, in the mop sink. Then continued to make someone a milkshake. Want some ice cream?
Bro, there is a rent-a-cop selling syringes out of the trunk of his car. This is why I hate the DMV.
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
We had a threesome and he gave us bottle rockets and a lamp for our apartment
Well I can't be held accountable to know every which time you slid a finger here or slid a finger there. I'm way too busy getting close to climaxing to document these things.
Kinda hard to look your partner in the face the day after a rousing game of How Many Ways Can I Capture Your Penis.
skipped tacos for a blowjob. No tacos. No blowjob. More importantly...no tacos. Wtf?
She looked like a cross between Jesus and John Lennon. So I fucked her. I feel majestic and powerful.
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