would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
I'm not working tomorrow. need to take advantage of the last opportunity for weeks of morning sex.
Dude apparently i ran into the middle of a half marathon last night and some how won
We were fucking on his hammock and right as he came we flipped over. I landed on him, he landed on a pile of pinecones. We're done with nature sex.
I would not be 19 again if you paid me. Guess who found naked pictures of themselves? Fuck cocaine
That little tingle vodka gives me in my esphagus is what lets me know I'm still alive.
they paper machayed me.
i told you ... never pass out drinking with preschool teachers.
Dude you missed it. This guy in the liquor store knocked over a whole display of 5 hour energy with his face.
Hey guys guess what I found in my bed this morning? I wish it was a man..but it was a potato
I literally stopped banging her when my ESPN app alerted me that the Spurs had won. That's how much I hate Lebron. I would rather watch him cry in the post game interviews than get it in
I was so high I started singing Let It Go and then instantly started laughing 'cause I was eating ice. Everyone just stared.
I think I need to see a chiropractor after giving that blow job
she came into my car to rip lines with our blow dealer as I was writing my essay on anti drug policy, i call it on site research
BTW, does Anne know that we used the lipstick she is currently wearing to was used to write the word "ASS" on my ass cheeks last night?
I HAD TO PAY A COVER FOR THE FIRST TIME LAST NIGHT. My tits didn't get me in and I was so pissed.
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