The next morning she woke up and asked who I was and where she was.
I woke up this morning to 4 booty call texts. So i am trying to find the sign that says i like to sit on cocks so that i can take it off.
trust me, i wonder where that sign is on a daily basis.
the next time i see a chick with leggings under her jean skirt...i'm gona beat her ass with a fashion magazine...
Just lost my virginity while listening to rick astley. torn between horror and jubilation
Vanilla vodka + chocolate soymilk does NOT equal an epic milkshake.
I just wanna go home eat some pizza rolls, get warm and jerk off, and it's only 845. This shit was supposed to make me see unicorns. Not cry
Yeah thats cool. We can play the alphabet game while doing bumps of coke in the back of his volswagon
Whiskey and an unstable home life is apparently the fountain that 20-something boys like to drink from.
Wrestling for my wallet turned into us almost having sex in the middle of the hallway
Why am I sticky / covered in baby Tylonel?
i need to un-sleep with a few of those brothers before we ever go back to that house again. i'm serious. i will not be a fraternity groupie.
I'm still not 100% sure who I'm sleeping with
Tell me not to drink and get on ladders. I think I need the reminder.. I'm clumsy enough sober.
Turns out end of the world sex is H-O-T, HOoot! I'll be the only progressive lady smiling today
8 minutes into the New Year and and I've already sent a nude...new year, new me?
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