Was it a mistake telling him I couldn't get the abortion until I was 2 months along on the first date?
Can we progress our friendship to a point where i'm at least granted a blowjob allowance?
You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
There are huge fuckin pieces of palm tree in the road. what a road hazard. as i sit here and text you as i swerve to miss them
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
He literally is quoting that 21 questions song, the 50 cent one. oh my god.
He burst into tears while I was blowing him. NEVER giving a bj for a graduation present again.
For the record, saying you're friends with the owner doesn't work when the owner is the one throwing you out.
doing shots of $6 a bottle whiskey and chasing it with milk. my own personal way of saying fuck life.
Get the cougar, get the cougar, get the cougar. Act like an injured baby deer. She will either eat you alive or nurse you back to health either way its still sex.
If you've never yelled, "fuck you ray Lewis" in front of your 87 year old grandfather you haven't lived
Here's to not getting arrested this year on thanksgiving again. Cheers bitches!
I either have food poisoning or I'm pregnant. Either way, I NEED JESUS!
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
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