Walking by Farrand Field is better than a porno right now.
This is how scared I get when I ride roller coasters. And how scared I was when I had to poop when I had herpes.
sweet and enthusiastic is code for tiny dick.
He just made a mudslide using rubinoff and swiss miss packets. This can't end well....
If we could never, ever tell mike i pissed in his closet, that would be really really great
Just pissed by glowstick light. Bad idea.
Aaaaand then she sang MDMA to the tune of the YMCA song, with appropriate gestures.
You kept yelling "wood grain wheel" and grinding on fat chicks.
The hell is wrong with me
First you say "it can't get any worse" and the next thing you know you've shat yourself on Christmas Eve.
Drunkenly, I gave him a molly instead of an aleve so A) I'm still looking for him and B) I'm not sure about his headache.
We duck taped Dave to a rolling chair and shoved him in the bed of the truck then took off for a bit.. We didn't explain it that way when the nurse asked what happened though.
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
I consider walking to the bars and dancing my exercise and I buy doubles so my drinks r heavier so that's my arm workout
Our livers are going to hate us.
It's okay, they're regenerative. God wanted this.
Btw I puked in your glovebox
Randomize
