We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
i walked in the apt and she was vacuuming. i asked why and she said so we could have sex on the floor. i love clean freaks.
$5 long island pitchers = roommate pissing on his laptop at 3am.
at what point did you think saran wrap was a better alternative to shoes?
We drove around last night shotting fireworks out the window while they had sex in the back of his car
I'm not saying Tijuana was a bad idea, I'm saying that we make poor life choices. And Steve was robbed by the police.
i woke up to you and that girl going out onto the balcony naked
oh sorry man.. we went outside because we DIDN'T want to wake you
the liver wants what the liver wants
wearing my old cheerleader outfit to the bar was a great way to get free drinks. i should do this more often
I can already feel the hangover I'll be having on New Year's Day. I don't know if I'm prepared for this.
friends are allowed to bang on New Years, I read it on the Internet somewhere.
A guy I hooked up with YEARS ago just endorsed me on LinkedIn for "customer service".
I have a bunch of bug bites on my ass... This is why you don't have sex against a tree in the woods
In the officer's defense, I was indeed pantless at the time he cuffed me, but there's a perfectly good explanation.
I'm noticing I drink less and do fewer lines when I do both together.
Now that's what I call smart money management.
Randomize
