Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.
Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
I'm not as easy in Europe as I am in the US
Only because you can wipe your slut slate clean & start anew. It's a little known benefit of our currency exchange.
Pretty sure the cab driver can even smell the sex coming from between my legs
Jen gave my number to some guy she met in NY. He sent me a picture of his weiner. He had nice shoes. I replied with a pic of bacon.
When in doubt always reply with bacon.
I don't care if he got kidnapped by a cult one time he is a dick
Dude are you being arrested? I swear I just saw you laying on the hood of your car with a cop patting you down...
There are two guys's cum on my sheets. Be a man and be the third.
Hook ups at LEGOLAND don't count right?
Are we playing inappropriate sexual encounters bingo?
also I can check "jump into a moving car" off my bucket list if that tells you how tonight is going
I HAVE DISCOVERED LONDON AND IT FILLS ME WITH JOY
If you ever tell anyone I offered you boob squeezes for cheetos, I'll kill you
I think I fucked the doubts about us out of him
What were you even doing out there at 2 a.m.?
Look, i had a gallon of lemonade, a pack of smokes and a Darth Vader voice changer. What did you EXPECT me to do?
i looked at my texts in the morning and saw that i had a full conversation with myself via text thinking it was someone else. i rejected myself
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