from now on my penis is your penis
I Once took so much Ecstacy that I tried to hug a fire.
i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
make sure i look cute passed out on the couch.
just ate frosted cheerios in coffee with some marshmellows. the college diet begins
You brought back some girl with you at 3am and introduced her to everyone as "hot pocket"
just joined the mile high club. if this plane crashes because of this text, it was worth.
After we fucked, her eye wouldn't stopped twitching and she could only move her hand, which she used to put her number in my phone
I'm still not a hundred percent.. I haven't shit anything solid in two days.. I have pulled my puker muscles and I can't take deep breaths cuz of other unidentified muscles/maybe heart attack
Important update! My next door neighbours have a canoe. Repeat: THEY HAVE A CANOE! We are having sex in it before this summer is over.
Head-banging is a very stupid way to injur yourself. But this opinion is also coming from somebody who can't walk right because they cut their asshole shaving last night, so it probably has little to no merit.
Yeah I'd rather get obliterated at home.
Same here. I'd like to ensure that I won't get pissed on.
If he would've shaved his beard when we first broke up, getting over him would've been so much simpler. That asshole.
Well I've always wanted to get head while playing WoW...
K I'll do it, but mine is going to be WAY weirder. Your not allergic to shellfish, right?
Car sex in a public place. Boo ya.
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