Let's make love on the newspapers that declare financial doomsday
i had the deer in headlights look when she walked in and i was digging in her hamper
I'm torn. Shes everything I ever wanted, but I just cant get past the story about having drunken sex with her dog in high school.
I play with my boobs when I'm bored. I playwith my nipples whe I'm drunk
As a pleasant surprise..I woke to find a Burrito and Bottle of Gatorade .....Merry XMAS to ME
He had one of those small greek statue penises
Just cleaned up my puke with my lecture notes.
I mean if she was naked in my room I would talk to her
this kid is using one arm to help his buddy with a keg stand, and the other arm to hold up the chick he's making out with.
i've never seen someone face fit so perfectly in a toilet bowl
Just saw a drunk guy clapping and cheering for a chipmunk climbing up a tree. Classic
I finally looked at the pictures from last night thanks for feeding me and pulling my pants up
Every grown women needs to pee herself once in her life. It builds character.
So far in the last ten minutes I have tried to pour cereal into a plate. Today's gonna be a great day.
I'm slowly getting to where I don't hate people anymore.
Never mind. Some random dude just walked past me and asked if I was having fun. I snarled at him. I might still kinda hate people.
Randomize
