Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
from now on my penis is your penis
Have you ever had champagne poured on you during sex? It was like a rap video
This is the LAST time i'm accepting the excuse "tequila made me do it". Even tequila thinks buying all of nickelback's itunes singles is fucking retarded
He insisted on sleeping in my bed. Had he taken all of my obvious hints I would have sucked his dick. He only wanted to snuggle. My world has been turned upside down.
i feel like the 7 eleven by your house knows our deepest, darkest secrets
I saw a guy do a line this morning in line to start the 5k, happy thanksgiving!
If you need to be the damsel in drunken distress make sure it's before 3.
When you pick me up at the airport, please have some sort of drugs on hand.
Our first order of business as new roommates was to test the sex acoustics of our rooms. I need a new box spring.
He slapped my ass... He best ask me out. Or figure out how to unslap my ass.
I keep picking up boring men who literally just want to cuddle. HOW AM I THIS BAD AT GETTING SEX?
You can get gift cards to the liquor store! This changes everything.
I told him I was studying his body for art, so now I have to actually do a drawing of him to not look like a creep and so we can hook up again.
the walk of shame isn't very shameful when your mom tells you she's proud of you.
Randomize
