After last night, I could never be a politician.
Just heard a guy discussing with someone else the amazing blow job you gave him. I’m in New York. Over 2 hours away from where you live. I have never been more proud.
I just texted him to come over because I want to see if his hand fits the handprint bruise on my ass.....I feel like the cinderella of S&M
The only way I could get him to agree to hook up with her is telling him I'd hook up with him next week.
Winner winner, chicken dinner. I am the sole survivor of the orgy without strep. Or maybe I was the carrier?
I'm having one of my monday morning walk of shame coffees if you care to join.
We don't have any ice, so I'm using the frozen cognac to reduce the swelling on Abby's toe.
And I was like "take off the damn flower crown, we're about to have sex not post an indie picture on tumblr"
why not an indie porn pic then
I haven't included my nuts in a shave since the Shaq/kobe Lakers era. I gave my self the ol full court press in order to change the tempo.
He may be 6' 6" but I'm 180 lbs of pure rage and determination
ayo
its like you know when i get waxed
I think one make out session at a bar per year is probably the best choice.
I'm sitting here drinking whisky and listening to The Wiggles, I don't need a social life
Hey. You got pizza and sex. How much more can you ask for?
I had more orgasms than hours of sleep this weekend. I’m going to keep him around a while
Randomize
