As heartfelt as your proposal was- I will NOT marry for money- especially to someone who still owes me $700. You r officially pathetic!!
"tonights gonna be a goodnight" was blasting at the club while i was screaming "NO ITS NOT" and crying. How do you think it went?
He just made me a heart out of cocaine... i think i'm in love
Sorry I had passed out by this time I think, with the chicken fingers ON my face in my bed, with all the lights on, and ketchup all over.
Just saw a woman walking a golden retriever and a vacuum down the road. I miss downtown.
Good thing it was his birthday because I accidentally grabbed his dick at the bar. A lot.
Anal and Aoki tickets...I'd say I give pretty good Valentines Day gifts.
You'll get a boner for sure
Way ahead of you. Kinda awkward while paying rent but hey
You ever just wake up and decide, today I'm going to eat a whole bag of fritos and a tub of cream cheese
I thought that wasn't a thing ever since she showed you her vag on the dance floor
We BOTH lost our virginities there. It's basically a landmark.
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
He just got out of surgery, almost died from shooting him self with an arrow.
She said my penis was powerful and magnificent
Waking up naked and dehydrated has become a regular occupancy for me.
Randomize
