Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
my grandma just told me that size does matter, and don't let anyone tell you anything different.
I'm sorry for coming into your work place and trying to smuggle you out in my purse.
Everytime I know she spent a lot of time on her hair for one of our dates, I intentionally cum on the top of her head. That's how she knows I pay attention.
Which is scary since we both think with our vaginas
All I need right now is some mouthwash, dignity, and security camera footage...
Found out people don't like it when you get drunk at fundraising auctions and bid in foreign currencies.
Well we get the HIV results on my birthday haha. It'll be like happy birthday kid, you have AIDS.
You see it tends to piss fathers off when they find their daughter in the arms of a shirtless guy that neither he nor his daughter knows.
The night got interesting when the random guy next to us handed us a bottle of champagne and the rest of his ciroc bottle. When we asked why he did it, he proceeded to point at his friend who face planted the floor.
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
Below this exterior of ice is a layer of cum. Followed by a pool of gin. More cum. Then, finally a heart.
chasing tequila with frosting. best baby shower ever.
I found a used condom and a hairbrush in my dryer this morning.
Hiring someone to do your laundry would be a good investment.
i just found a pair of your underwear stuffed behind my harry potter books...was that on purpose?
haha no, it was majik
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