I just cut my nipple shaving
Idk if this white stuff in my shower is conditioner or... something else?
If God's watching us, we might as well be entertaining
Don't ask how, but I'm pretty sure my name is now on a lease to a taco bell franchise in maryland...
My therapist is concerned about your alcoholism.
I have her designated blowjob hair tie on my wrist. It's like a key to eternal happiness
Driving by his house every hour is not stalking, it's a reconnaissance mission... How else can I confront him
i also took my stockings off in the bathroom and blew my nose with them in the cab ride home. james was appalled
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
I have no idea what that means but I'm googling things just so I can watch my thumbs move
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
Its a holy bong. We had to bless the holy bong water.
Oh my god, are you sexting me while watching the Democratic debate.
100%
Now I'll never know if it was me that got you worked up, or Bernie Sanders' social policies.
Pro tip: If you tell him that his dick looks like a muppet then you won't have to see him again.
He’s over 6 feet has amazing posture and went to Harvard and has an awesome job and a great dick and loves Jesus and is an organ donor
Is this the guy you have listed as free food in your phone
Noooo he’s listed as free food #5
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