You want to go to a white party at LAX
Clubs are lame especially themed ones. Im not in a fucking episode of laguna beach
we are driving next to a guy driving and masturbating while looking at a naked magazine. I love LA
Even Lady Gaga hates Purdue
i'm satisfied with the level of pretty that his new girlfriend isn't.
my six pack is really starting to show since I started fucking everything that moves
My vag has a bald spot. That is so middle aged. Is this my midlife crisis?
being a senior sucks, I just started embracing my inner slutty college girl, and it's almost time to put her away...for like, ever. and i really like her.
Woke up to a note written on my hand that read "just because he kisses you, doesn't mean you have to sleep with him"
next time, write it on your vagina so its more effective.
He's like a fucking cake pop, the greatest thing in the world while it lasts, but it never lasts for long enough
We don't have the same problems as normal people do we?
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
Don't tell me you're on acid again
We never leave a bad bitch behind. its a party foul..we'll find you somehow
You fell asleep while I was sucking your dick
So, is Canada considered an excessive distance to go for a booty call? Asking for a friend...
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