she woke up with a sticky ear
Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
So the "just a friend" kid confessed his love for me...sometimes I hate how awesome I am.
he passed out on the stove with a cup in his hand. yes the pictures are hilarious
just upper decked a verizon store cause they don't cover against "getting phone crushed by a keg." had to pay 175 for a new one
I think the best part was when you jumped over me naked.
I just had some guy offer to eat me out on my lunch break... I think single life is getting better everyday
how do you ask an olympian for your underwear back?
I joined the mile high club last night. I ran a mile while high on coke. It was glorious
I finally figured out how to tighten my bra straps and I feel like a god
It was great. Somehow, sleeping with her sister cured everything!
I got my gum stuck on his balls.
He said we had an hour long conversation about how awesome I was.
This is random but I just wanted to thank you for all the things you taught me sexually in life.
I kinda just want to steal him and keep him forever
Randomize
