me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
I have two stamps on my hand....ones from the bar and one is from an aquarium...care to explain?
You know, there is no convenient place for your beer when you are on shrooms taking a shower.
She keeps sending, "show me your elephant trunk."
Hung over does not do it justice. I am hung like a horse over. I am hungover and over and over. I am hung, drawn and quartered fucking over. They just told me I can't keep my sunglasses on in the office. Fuck drinking with you people.
He gave me a hug and said "He doesn't deserve you, Anna. Your boobs are great, and I'd fuck you anytime. Any. Place." I need a new 'gay' friend.
No no don't get confused. We do chemistry homework on Thursdays. We screw on Fridays. Other than that, Words With Friends is our only communication five days a week. We are NOT dating.
So I think my aunt and her one legged boyfriend are getting it on in the next room. Traumatized does not even begin to describe what I am right now
How am I supposed to be friends with him when there's an exact replica of his dick in my underwear drawer?
I was smelling my bathroom to make sure it didn't reek of weed...I spaced out and realized I was face to the wall sniffing it for 5 minutes.
Come on, will you just fuck him so we can watch Star Wars.
i need some fresh meat. meat that has a license and a job and isn’t a FULL-blown alcoholic. partial i could tolerate, bc, haha, let’s be honest, me likey my drinkies.
Hey buddy, turns out those were the PB&shroomwiches, soooo you may want to reconsider dinner with your girlfriends family tonight...
This is the difference between me and him; he buys you flowers, I buy you a dildo
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