I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
I just accidently sent my poop smells like vodka to 27 people in my phone book
spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
i'm at a party where swedish girls are dumping laundry detergent on each other because it glows in blacklight. this is awesome
there were no ball for pong so he bought cat toys..... they had bells in them
This girl just texted me asking me to drop her cheese. What the fuck for that mean?
Did he seem like the type of guy that would maybe take weed as payment?
How did "late lunch" turn into 8 solid hours of drinking??? I feel like death.
It's not even 11, i dropped a shot glass, nick is bleeding, and everyone is drunk
Molly was fun. I was in a captain planet onesie in Wal-Mart talking to everyone haha
He's interpretive dancing to Crazy by Britney Spears and expressing his feelings for either me or the guy next to us
How do you clean puke off a stuffed bear?
If he refers to me as slump buster one more fucking time.
Crazy homeless man drinking beer out of a vitamin water container on the bus just set me up on a date with the yuppie next to him
St. Patty's shenanigans tmrw? I wanna meet dudes lol. Why stop at coronavirus when you can get the clap, too?
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