I've decided to film a documentary centered around how he manages to keep that beast caged in such tight pants
Im eating ham and mustard naked, watching south park, but its totally cool cuz the paper plate is covering my nuts
a queef is a wish your heart makes.
I've been congratulating people on facebook about their forthcoming pregnancies. I can't wait to see how this plays out
ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
it's a "shave your legs in the cvs bathroom" kind of night
doing shots of $6 a bottle whiskey and chasing it with milk. my own personal way of saying fuck life.
He taught me where the gears in a five speed are with his penis.
Dude, the lecture theatre is caving in on me.
Okay hun. Well my neighbors haven't called the cops yet so I think we're good. No more burning in the yard.
He can only pee with the faucet running. It's like I'm dating a fucking toddler.
Do I lose at life if I cry in a grocery store while buying a pregnancy test?
Tent sex on an air mattress requires balance and flexibility. Not for the faint of heart
Someone signed my nipple.
i'm not sure what you are doing right now, but i know that i don't like it. whatever you are doing. just stop. come here so we can fuck
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