im gay
i know
yea but for you.
woke up 7 floors down in the lobby...i my underwear. New high or new low?
New experience?
all we need is a shotglass and a helicopter.
we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
Word to the wise: learn how to ask "What is my bail posted as" in French before traveling abroad.
I heard an explosion in the backyard. You told me you were playing "will it burn".
You should fuck with them and beat off in the cup and then walk out an be like, "This was a sperm donation right?"
We ate our feelings. Then drank our feelings. I feel feminism delivered.
Braid them armpits, sister.
Our conversation concluded a weekly schedule of casual sex in between classes.
the texts you sent will act as the rosetta stone for all drunk people
Hey guys.. So I accidentally broke the front door last night
I just don't understand why your parents aren't supporting your dreams of being a medieval weapon smith.
it's like the easy bake oven version of plastic surgery
So learned a new trick last night.... Taking body shots from my own tits... Mom would be so proud
Yoooooo, the fat magician married the chick I dumped a beer on after I got pissed he was flirting with her in front of me
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