check it out our google latitudes are spooning
I feel like people whose favorite movie is Donnie Darko should not be allowed to talk. Ever.
he started fingering my stomach rolls instead of my vag... am i really that fat?
She had a little wicker basket of condoms by her bed. Disturbing yet convenient.
I know I'm all grown up when I don't have to take my pregnancy test in the store bathroom anymore.
i have my graded calc test (94%) sitting on my empty case of beer next to my desk. this is me winning at college.
i don't think my dad can get all that mad since he got arrested for almost exactly the same thing last weekend
I may have broken a few toes and my face hurts. I do know that I pissed the bed so at least I've got some closure there
I've ID'd the nipple biter.
He just asked for the blowjob I promised him 3 years ago that he'd get the next time Michigan beat Ohio State. Goddamnit.
I think it's god's punishment for my behavior in Vegas . Lies were told. Angels were defiled. Pools were pissed in
I wiped my ass with some girl's sock, I would honestly admit if I hate Caitlin's sandwich.
I woke up this morning next to my computer with Google search results for "how to put out a fire."
I'm very scared to turn around.
Executive decision.... we are cuddling naked
She was talking about how a garden gnome was hitting on her the whole night. We thought she was just that high, but turned out the gnome was that guy in the weird hat.
Randomize
