are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
I walked into his living room and saw him watching the play-offs while eating tomato paste out of the can with a bottle of wine. I'm telling you to stop talking to him. now.
failed my one goal of the day: wake up before 2 pm.
New game: find the sober person in Tbell
This is even worse then that time I fucked a guy just because he had air conditioning.
Just called the bar: "hi this is the girl who you kicked out for excessive bleeding, do you happen to have my coat?"
We welcome drunken adversity.
With open legs.
You know me. Don't need roses, just dick and food.
...if you're living vicariously thought me, that was a great blow job you just gave in the B&N parking lot.
Yes. We drank 3/4 of a handle of vodka, fried and ate a 3lb package of bacon, I tackled the neighbors snowman, made snow angels in our underwear, and then fucked all night. Christmas success.
I had a dream that I had to take a breathalyzer but then it turned out to be a bong....why can't that be real life?
They're fighting and it sounds intense. Cross your fingers for their demise
Toss in some raw meat and play heavy metal music. It will insight violence.
The real estate's complaint had the words "loud squealing at 2am" in it. Then I remembered that was me spoon feeding you guys old potato salad while you screeched like baby birds. Great night.
I just want to have sex that doesn't end like a B-rated horror movie.
So anyway, I'm just floating along life with my vibrator and low expectations.
Randomize
