i ate 2 chicken nuggets and puked out 5. that doesn't even make mathematical sense
You yelled "bananas are an excellent source of pottasium!"4 times in the middle of class. how do you not remember?
I don't even know what potassium is.
Just found out I slapped a vegan in the face with meat last night.
I have shoes on. No pants. And my jacket pockets are full of ketchup and grass. Yes. Good night.
So i was told that i peed in the sink, had sex with a pillow and banged on a washer while singing idian chants
His idea of a compliment is: 'you're cuter than your friend. If you both wanted a 3way I'd do it,but I'd pay more attention to you.'
they just started filling water ballons with vodka.
on my way.
It wasn't the stripper that gave you the hickey but I just figured out who did
the thought 'we cant do it, we're in a public place' crossed my mind, and then I realized he's succeeding if he's trying to domesticate me.
elevator sex. pronto.
LOVE ME LIKE A KANGARO LOVES A POUCH YOU DUMB CUNT
We could supplement the Tour with Edward Andre-hands. Because 40s are for the 99%.
Is that a tongue signal to get over there? That's how my two heads are taking it.
He was bigger soft than my ex was hard. A gold medal rebound.
so this maintenance guy stood at the corner of my cubical and scratched his balls for like a full minute cause he thought no one could see him
Thank you for stopping me from getting a butt tattoo. That was a good call.
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