i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
I hate when people I sell to add me on Facebook. I'm your dealer, not your friend, C'mon people.
You would not believe how incredibly hard it is to climb on top of a three story apartment buildings roof from the air conditioning unit
THAT DOESN'T MEAN YOU SHOULD LET ME CHUG VODKA.
Everybody knows the last week of summer internships include showing up to the office hammered and hitting on the CEO
no you're not allowed back
come on. everbeers was a great idea. you fucks had a great night
He was having a "party in the princess castle." At what point do I blindfold him and take him to AA?
I'm concerned that this blind man on the bus has a boner right now
I was hammered helping a pregnant woman at the gas station name her unborn child. We had to try everything with two different last names because she was waiting on the results of her paternity test.
Drunk wound on my leg hast healed and neither has my dignity
I was supremely disappointed in the lack of dick and doughnuts in my life last week.
who knew my inner goddess was such a whore
This is the best thing we've done since that time we started a religion
She grabbed the other one and started playing tug-o-war against the blonde chick. I told you getting my nipples pierced was a good idea
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