I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
I'm exhausted and I have velveeta stuck in my teeth
Did you eat out Derrek's girlfriend again?
I've never watched DWTS before, but this show's got Pamela Anderson, Erin Andrews and Brooke Burke: 3 of my top 10 all time most masturbated to women.
I just learned you can mail a coconut. I'll be over in 3 days with the rum.
took 4 advil with a shot of vodka, figure i'd try to save myself now
I just did a sobriety test in a tutu.
I asked for a steak knife but the waitress could see in my eyes it was a bad idea
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
if masturbating while stoned isn't called "weed whacking" then i just don't know how to live my life anymore
they adjusted my tv to black and white ... i thought i drank myself to colorblindness
This is the Taco Bell dump we've all been waiting for.
Apparently HR frowns upon current employees introducing themselves to the new employee as "Hi I'm sleeping with your cousin"
You can tell by the way he cuddles that he's got mommy issues
He just ate a tooth whitening strip...
You're a FUCKING ASSHOLE. Love mom
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