fuck, i think i'm broken. Alchyhol air mattress = the suck.
I want you more than these girls want KFC
you yelled then hung up at the girl on information bc she could not pinpoint your location and tell you how to get to dennys
I'm sorry but all I really read was "my nipples will get hard."
They had an entire room dedicated to passed out people. It was like a dogpile of cross faded toddlers drooling on each other.
We started telling people we were married, and then we hooked up on a park bench
Maybe it's the vicodin, but all I wanna do is hunt wild hogs.
yeah people on the adjacent balcony, Im naked drinking outside in 0 degree weather at 1pm. got a problem?
I don't like him near enough to give up day drinking AND my prostitute costume
And by go well you mean everyone's hammered right?
Yupp. And someone's bleeding
Some random at the bar just whispered in my ear that he wants to eat me out while on bath salts....
can we for just one second remember that I played with a homeless man's rat at st marks?
Yeah he drove 30 minutes at 3 AM to come fuck me in my neighbors treehouse
It's like we're in an emotionally distant three-way and there's not even sex to show for it.
I resent the implication of a jizz addiction
Randomize
