so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
he spent the whole night trying to convince me into a2m. i won't even use the pb til i clean the jelly knife. i love him but it's not going to happen.
The line was so long at Kum n Go some guy opened & drank 2 beers from his 12 pack while waiting.
im in class. still drunk. wearing one sock. eating a breakfast sandwich and trying to make sure this bottle of whiskey doesnt fall out of my purse in front of my professor
i've noticed that whenever i have to ask myself "would i be doing this if i was sober?" the answer is probably no.
She puked in the bank of America parking lot? Awesome.
Yeah, figured I'd deposit my check while we were there.
just spent the last 4 hours covering his room in sticky notes. Viva Drunk Thursdays.
But now he's gone and I'm exhausted and my vagina is yelling at me and I want a cheeseburger
girl pulled up to the stop sign, got out, threw up all over my hood said happy thanksgiving then drove off
My tinder date had to be home by 8:30 cause she's on house arrest.
You are cordially invited to the annual finals week stress relief drinking binge at our manor this evening
You're supposed to discourage my sluttiness not bring me hot Colombian men
dollar rum and cokes, see you on the dark side of infinity
I am playing in the snow in my bunny outfit. GET OVER HERE
She just texted me saying "come over and eat me out, my vagina smells like honey glazed ham." I know I shouldn't be, but i'm just so curious.
Randomize
