I'm sorry my penis didn't work
I just broke up with Liz. I feel awful so I put two free rentals on her Blockbuster account.
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
They had half off shots during the fourth quarter. I was powerless.
My mom is helping me re-arrange my room to make New Year's more hook-up friendly
i left after you tried to balance a shot of tequila on your head while screaming at the bar tender that you fucked his girlfriend
Just saw 1 guy dressed as a cow and another dressed as a shrimp dancing on the side of the road. We're turning around I NEED to dance with them.
Drinking franzia alone at noon watching a cheese themed episode of "The Chew" I'm ready to admit I need a job.
Not sure why, but I was running back and forth across the road. Cab hit me and gave us a free ride home.
This election needs to be over, im tired of girls asking who im going to vote for mid hookup
We BOTH lost our virginities there. It's basically a landmark.
How does one acquire holy water?
Im about to get an ultrasound of my balls. I hate waiting. Its the worst.
dude me and this dog are gonna go bond oon the tramplene with stromboli... i think everyone is staring at me... being this high is SO stressful
Randomize
