hey im gonna send you a picture of my dinner
if its a picture of your dick again we are no longer friends
he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
last nights makeup is better than no makeup at all.
I just finished washing your number off of my chest. I'm Bryan by the way.
I made him tell me how he proposed to his wife before I'd bang him. I have a problem.
I distinctly recall there being a "I can't be dead 2maro" stipulation to going out last night. There's been a breech of contract
You kicked in the door when she was blowing him. You dont remember do you?
You may or may not have poured bacon fat down her shirt
Either call me back or tell me you're in jail. For fucks sake. If this is a cop, just help out. national league.
That gas station is used for only two things, picking up moonshine and getting murdered. Only two outcomes.
Did you drink ALL that 151??
No. We drank all the jaeger... Then used the 151 to start the fire. We're also out of paper towels... And your hairspray is flammable.
Btw had an awesome time last night. Found some blood on my shirt and ear but I'll chalk it up to the tequila shots.
I'm more than my video games and dildo collection
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
Did you get good sleep?
I dreamt that I was a lipstick lesbian in the 1950s, working at Walgreens and solving mysteries.
So yes.
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