I'm drinking ghetto ass mojitos!
Wow. How can mojitos be ghetto?
Squirt + bacardi limon + limes = ghetto mojitos
chris hansen is no longer pursuing child predators.let's celebrate
i'll bring the hard lemonade and lube
all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
i just woke up in the hallway. not my hallway. i officially raise my hand to be DD next week.
Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
he was like a christmas ornament you would hang on the back of the tree....not great but still made the cut.
just woke up to a 10 min voicemail of you singing "99 red ballons".... you need to work on your german..
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
By this time next year I expect us to have full time jobs that we can call out of so we can day drink on beautiful days like this. Oh, and grill.
I was afraid she wouldn't be able keep up but I woke up in a bathtub, she called me a pussy and made me pancakes.
I don't know if should be sitting on a toilet or kneeling in front of it
You had 10 drinks. On a first date.
I just masterbated then started bawling.
I just accepted my offer to work as a camp counselor over the phone between shots of Fireball. This is going well for me so far.
It figures that the only time one of my videos on Snapchat gets replayed is a video of my Hedonism Bot impression and NOT my nudes
No, I'm not a heathen. You two are the heathens, I'm the whore.
just saw a girl run into an automatic sliding door, back up and try again
Randomize
