Bea Arthur died yesterday
You shut your stupid mouth
Betty White is next, I just know it.
Betty White will never die! She's like Dick Clark. Rue McCalahan is next.
Well yesterday i made out with the entire football team and rifht at this very moment our waiter looks like a ken doll. Straight up. And he gave me wine so ill probly make out with him
college has opened so many doors for you
I feel like I owe it to them to wear pants.
I mean we had sex in a crib. You tell me how my night was.
I can promise you that this new years eve will rival the one from senior year when we got that exchange student deported.
someone to text and fuck? since when does that constitute a relationship?
since 2006
Hate sex is good. Drunk sex is better. Combine those two however and you get the best experience of your LIFE.
I came in and she was laying on the ground just stoking it saying "the floor is where our feet step"
I think we need to dedicate ourselves to building your stamina back to uterus breaking level
So my new thing apparently is getting wasted, showing people my slytherin socks and convincing them I'm slytherin..because why not
I would be down to associate sex w taco bell
But if you move out who will get drunk with me on the roof and yell at boys?!?
I just started an apology with "so I'm sorry about throwing the Brita at your head last night..."
Your dick is the only reason I have motivation to come back to school today
hey im sorry i made fun of the color of your sheets, but like it was all i could focus on during sex because they were just THAT UGLY
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