I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
she just stood in the kitchen yelling "REAL WOMEN HAVE CURVES"
u sent me just one boob. one just doesnt do it for me. u dont get full on a half a rack of ribs u need a full one
love being home for thanksgiving just had grandma pick me up from the frat by her house
You broke into someone's house and stole a pan of lasagna.
Why doesn't the washer have a puke setting?
Ya these assholes wanted to like sit around and eat cupcakes and watch the notebook. I was like fuck you, I want to go make some people uncomfortable in public.
1 tequila 2 tequila 3 tequila, floor.
*roof
I hate him. I fucked every one of his friends AND his fat brother and he still won't break up with me.
Just had a flashback to Friday. Definitely had my hands in someone's bra. Definitely wasn't mine.
The guy at the bar repeatedly told us he was an off duty cop from out of town, that to normal people would be the time where you stop asking him to smoke a blunt with us
The sound of my own breathing is making my head throb. That hungover.
My apartment is also really close to an alcohol rehab in case I get out of hand
G&T. Gin and tonic. GIN AND TONIC. GIN AND TONIC AND FUCKING LIME
I’ll call you later. There’s a jilted trophy wife looking for a revenge fuck at my door
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