where are you
in your bedroom
how did you get in
your wife…
WTF
the sex was like sticking it in a jar of mayonnaise
I think jizz is working it's way to becoming my number 1 food source.
Either I'm losing my touch or ED is running rampant in 20 something men now
i licked icing off his dick. in front of his sister.
By this time tomorrow I expect us to be sitting at the kitchen table either playing a drinking game, or crying. Set an alarm
his teacher called to say he gave a girl on the playground a rock to touch his penis. proudest moment of my fatherhood
I thought turtle was a code word for weed until he pulled out a baby turtle from his pocket and said "$20 for a turtle"
I picked up the bartender so he could open the bar early and ended up with him giving me a ride home when he closed. I like snowdays and everything, but they get really expensive. Also, I think I threw up on his front door. Not checking.
Just remember that I named his dick Robo-cock before he got into the sheriff's department.
Woke up this morning with Nerf Bullets stuck to everything in my house and nut in my belly button. What exactly happened last night?
A guy just picked up ur brother and carfied him away singing and im slight concern
Serious question, on a scale of go for it to what the fuck are you thinking, what's me going to a monk or any religious official and saying "baptize me daddy" in a serious voice?
I complemented his smile, he sends me a dick pic. Seriously?
I cannot, in good conscience, let you talk to a guy who wears Chaps and a knit beanie
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