i just ate something from under my fingernail. i dont know what it was, but it tasted half decent
I just puked in an auto zone parking lot. I'm never eating peanut butter and red wine for dinner again.
jusi got death stares at taco bell because I asked if Denise was working.
I'm allowed to be upset. I've never had that many fingers in my ass
Yeah dude, it's amazing. Be careful though, that shit is really really intense. Like it's way more intense than normal shit...
I took two and feel like crushed diamonds spread over glazing marmalade
I just found pizaa roll in my hair. Already been to class today
My neighbour is taking her hamster for a walk on a leash. Come over now
I don't think I'm allowed to have Burger King. What if i just chew for taste and not actually consume. Like a wine connoisseur for fast food
Fucking that physical therapist guy was the best decision I ever made.
Why isn't there a super hero that comes to the aide of really high kids when they kill their car battery?
Lol woke up with mangoes in bed with me
On a scale of "huh, that's interesting" to "holy porn stars, batman". How good?
Definitely closer to "holy porn stars, batman".
I cannot belive our party caught on fire
I like shiny stuff tho if that’s an emotion
Leave it to my mom and I to turn the hearing into a drinking game.
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