Just so you know, the bottle of red gatorade is NOT GATORADE. It is definitely someone's puke. I hope nobody else makes the same mistake I did.
My 54 year old father just sent me a YouTube link on my school email titled "Walrus sucks his own dick" and then wrote in the email "I wish I were a walrus". What the fuck is wrong with my family?
This Casey James character from American Idol is really gonna mess up my sex life.
Or maybe the fact that you know who Casey James is will be what messes up your sex life.
Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
"Whiskey Cheerios" was a terribly great idea.
He kept dropping hints about giving me crabs. Like he called my pubes a nest and said he "hoped there weren't any eggs in there."
Apparently she got a minor consumption for using vodka soak tapmons
Does that work!! Please say yes
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
She spilled creme de menthe on her crotch and I told her she looked like a menstruating Vulcan (costume idea!). Obviously, I went home alone.
I fucked my ex boyfriend to get shrooms for you guys
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
I had sex while you were puking this morning and I'm sorry. Kind of.
It's ok. I had sex while you were drunk crying last night. We're even.
Can we go out and get blitzed in celebration that they'll be no more surprise kids
How do you feel about a threesome?
Will you be there?
I'm the one asking!
She was doing drunken zumba and screaming "FUCK YOU I HAVE MY OWN STYLE!" at the TV
You know you're drunk when you have to be picked up out of a bathtub.
Randomize
