Watching NYC prep. Doing a shot everytime one of these d-bags flips his hair. I give it 10 minutes before alcohol poisoning set in.
he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
Whoa, Gary Coleman died
Whatchu talkin bout?!?!
Too soon.
Not cool at all. Last night I organized my condoms by expiration date. I need to get laid.
they came at us with fireworks while we were skinny dipping in her jacuzzi at 4 am...
My dildo fell into the bathtub. It sounded like a chainsaw.
I'm gonna do some tripping... In the direction of balls
She thinks Jesus was an astronaut.
whats our policy on dating high schoolers?
we dont have a policy but im pretty sure the state of michigan does
That was the second worst thing to happen to my asshole.
Just a couple of adults talking about cum shots at 8am on presidents day
Guy just walked in with a 40 and a Honda steering wheel. Where the fuck am I?
He showed up with a hearse full of beer and is currently shooting pumpkins with a flare gun. Who gives a shit if he's a furry. We need to party with him more often.
No instead we fucked in the elevator.. it was wrong on so many levels..
How tall was the building? Maybe it was only wrong on some of them
Just a typical Friday. Dinner, drinks, doing lines with a member of Congress
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