Yeah he kicked my ass... He probably wouldnt have hit me as hard though if I wasnt lauging and yelling " I fucked your sister I fucked your sister" over and over again.
i really wish i had a remote for my computer. its all the way on my bed while im across the hall puking my brains out to enya. not cool.
It's not kidnapping if it's romantic
then he pulled down his pants, and i just stared for about a minute..... i was so confused. i didnt know my cat could have a bigger penis than an 18 year old man.
I passed out leaning next to a light pole. When the cop woke me up at 4 AM, I told him I was a block away from the apt, just had to stop to make a puke pit stop.
Someone left a beer in front of your door...there's a note with it that says "peace offering"
his mom gave me my lost underwear folded up along with the rest of my christmas present. tell me this cannot be happening.
We are not buying weed off a guy from the internet.
This is the weirdest negotiation ever.
This is what happens when two people with zero shame try to argue.
Well he just said "there's glass on the floor and it's okay I'm only bleeding out of my esophagus" so yes he's tripping
... Cuz there's nothing like having your two male roommates catching you have a good cry in the driveway at 9am on a Wednesday.
Her rack rivals that of the deer I shot last season. You need to get after that.
Not to play devil's advocate, but, considering how our species has evolved so far... I'm kinda rooting for the sun on the whole heat death thing.
I should have known when she said it would be "fun" we'd end up in the hospital
I’ve got full Covid immunity, blonde hair and great tits! I’m basically unstoppable
Randomize
