if you like me you must not know who I am
I am now trying to reassure her that she doesn't have a wide-set vagina. So thanks, for whatever you said.
Well I'm currently debating between getting toilet paper or getting my eyebrows waxed so... There's that
She's trying to put on her dog muzzle on her self
Hate you missed the after party, I was covered in dish soap gliding bare assed down a slip n slide at 6:30 this morning
I'm at the bar, forgot my pants. Everyone's over reacting
I fell asleep on the floor again. i dont want help, just a pillow. its kind of nice down here.
tuscaloosa is terrifying
like people here are just empty shells of drugs and sin
there is no mercy here
I'm constantly crying, and now I start crying every time I masturbate which is a fun development.
The guy I made out with the other night fed me chipotle favored funions and I thought it was true love when I was drunk.
I'll call you on my way home
Oh my god I'm going to die between now and then... can you at least tell me if y'all hooked up???
I'm actually pretty sure the amount of alcohol I drank last night erased memories from other times in my life.
what the fuck happend anyway? How did it go from smoothies after work to blacking out?
I don't know if I'm having early flu symptoms, a miscarriage, or am badly hungover. Web md agrees.
Put down the Captain Crunch and get over here. It’s a dickfest!!
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