Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
I feel miserable, can't drink that much when I go out
We've been saying that since '98
dont worry your back hair reminds me of angel wings
Nights of college: 1. Virgins: 1. Yes.
Woke up with a retainer in my boxers and about ten chicks passed out around me. now I feel like something out of Cinderella, trying to find whose teeth fit in the glass retainer.
totally poinked my lawyers daughter in his hot tub last night. i figure getting off is just compensation for not getting me off.
I just walked by a party bus on my way to study. God hates me.
Well i'm not entirely sure considering he gave my vagina an early valentine's day card that said "you're purrfect."
She liked to slap me in the face while she was on top. All I can say is that big boobs can excuse a lot.
I took 36 pictures of my lava lamp. your weed wins.
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
I just hit on a guy in a doughnut store... is that too suggestive?
I just licked wine off my own thigh. I've hit a new low.
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
This may sound strange but do you have my pants?
You tried to trade them for some girls skirt... So she has them...
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