they almost convinced me to put "Funbags" in the 'other names you may be known as' section of the job application
It never fails.. every time I have a dick in my mouth he calls me.
You had a towel around you and you called it your shot bib.
I don't care if he's straight, his cock will be in my mouth by midnight. Like a closeted Cinderella.
hr gave me pretxwk salad and a doubke shot of grey goose. i approve! tou guys are a beautidil couple.
Siri just called me GayBoy in front of my family. I will destroy you.
Because it was 5am and I had a shitty mixed drink and I was threatening to put my balls in your face.
Not the worst first impression I've experienced.
I spilt beer on the table, and she quickly got a straw and yelled party foul and made me drink it.
Am I supposed to confront my 52-year-old boss/mother of 3 about the fact that we matched on Tinder?
I'm pretty sure our sex is better than most foods and that says a lot too bc I really like food
I need dunkaroos back in my life.
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
Woke up with a grilled cheese in my hand, it was like god giving me a high five for the night before
Turns out the guy I did all that coke with the other night is a cop
We're dating now
He stumbled out of their hotel room and yelled, "I'M ON A STATEWIDE TOUR. I'VE BEEN IN KENTUCKY AND OKLAHOMA."
Randomize