I masturbated on the webcams with my bf yesterday then typed without washing my hands first... then my roommate used my laptop it was pretty priceless
awesome recipe for disaster- bar hopping at the airport
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
Pretty sure a homeless guy just told me to 'lick his balls clean' because I looked at him.
in case you blackout.. this is confirmation that yes, you were sitting spread eagle on the kitchen floor chugging pickle juice out of the jar.
Dancing naked to Celine dion - im alive. No better way to start the day
I have been referring to it as "thanks for getting out of me day" all week. Do you think they will still take me to brunch tomorrow?
I'm two sheets to the sexual wind
My roomate has me out looking for easter kegs hidden arround town
So I'm not dead, but close call. I think I can handle one more bar.
My mom comes home from her weekend with her lesbian co-workers and asks "You wanna know how I got these bruises?" I've never been more torn about anything EVER.
He was feeling me up but acting like he was asleep. Like WTF does that mean??
Yupp. He's definitely a screamer.
Do you think it would be okay if i cleaned my cartilage piercing with the leftover vodka?
And on the 323rd day without sex, God finally said let there be light...or love?
Randomize