Can we have unprotected sex soon?
Don't quote me on that, I'm a walking boner
What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
Phease come get me i thought i was in a place i don't even understand
We could be hammered at a childrens film. You failed me
WE COULD TOTALLY DO ECSTASY AND GO TO THAT CAT SHELTER OFF OF BROADWAY.
Yup. We're now banned from TWO of our nation's finest zoos.
I'm so glad you support me having casual sex with your uncle
He seems like a lot more than a waste of tequila
I shit you not. Dude complemented me for being meme savvy. You could drown a toddler in my panties right now.
So? Find me, fuck me, then you can go to sleep and I'll leave.
Wow. That's the most amazing thing anyone has ever said to me.
There is a pool of ranch salad dressing in my purse...I know thats always been something you've wanted to try..so don't even act like you didn't do this.
Then, even the devil himself would be scared of us. And we'd be bestfriends with Jesus. He would love us.
What's that? Is there a bottle of Jack calling me? I think so...
location: under the moon. please find me. need ride home.
Randomize
