They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
I thouht it was time to go to sleep and suddenly I was front row on brokeback mountain
im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
we screwed to my bar mtzvah tape, I became a man while watching myself becom a man
Last night was epic. Hooked up with Emma Watson, found twenty bucks, and then passed out on my floor.
No you didn't. You drank unbelievable amounts of 151, passed out in someone else's bathroom, and we carried you back to your floor. Nice dreams though.
and my loofah got caught on my nipple ring in the shower today. what an awful experience.
it's all just a bunch of faces and i remember what the floor looked like.
He tried to say the picture wasn't him. Like I'd forget his curved boner.
I joined a mariachi band. they gave me a guitar because i told them i could play. It actually turned out ok
They kicked me out of the mariachi band. Turns out I'm not that good
I still don't understand how I went from crying to blowing you in like two minutes.
Oh god iv'e slept with this police officer before oh god oh god
i spent 45 minutes yellng Heather I feel so bad i wanna die and then 45 more yelling I DONT WANNT TO DIE. thats how drunk i was
oh and apparently my boobs are named "have no fear" and "plenty o'beer"
So, i might have left my morals back in 2011.
My ex's girlfriend just invited me clubbing. Guess who won the breakup?
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