I miss him.. What the hell did I get myself in to? I guess it will get better with time.
No. Just liquor. Time's no good.
tried to be sexy and unbutton his shirt with my teeth. ended up slobbering all over it. thank god he was already passed out
I just feel like Im gonna be remembered as that one RA guy that used to sell weed
Remember that time we were in the handicap bathroom snorting Molly at the stripclub. That was a defining moment in our friendship
I would rather burn my vagina off with a damn flame thrower before I would touch anything that has touched her skank ass.
You need to stop thinking about the needs of your vagina and concentrate on the greater good
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
Just to let you know... If you ever want to get me a gift, the One Direction perfume comes out soon....... It's called Our Moment. It's an appropriate gift for a 25 year old woman.
A man in a black on black escalade pulled up next to me, and told me he was sent to pick me up by you.
His name is Tyreece. He will take you to the weed emporium, population me.
I'm too stoned to come over for sex
Yes that is a Krispy Kreme doughnut on my cock
I'll be right over
I'm just going to ride dicks all the way to the to the gates of hell
The Dick I got last night was so phenomenal that I had to take a fucking personal day today.
All I'm wearing right now is a condom and a sock.
Just one?
Yup. One sock.
Dont... please don't. Don't fuck him on his bean bag bed
Saw throw up in the parking lot at work, glad I'm not the only one. But now the search begins.
Mary's wearing shades at her desk, brilliant!
Randomize
