Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
My body isn't even mad at me...just disappointed
just crush a couple of percocets into it. tell him sam adams came out with a new beer. flavored with sleep.
He said he had to make up a lie of why he couldnt sleep with her. It must really suck to have a sunburned dick.
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
i chased bacardi with meat sauce last night
I'm pretty sure my moms getting nailed in the bathroom right now while I'm chaperoning. God damn it.
How sad is it that I'm looking in the farm & garden section of craigslist to find a weed dealer. I mean, that's where they'd be right? Just gotta break the code.
He showed up at my house, drunk, proclaiming that he needed to fuck me...my dad let him in
Still not over the fact that we prayed to Jesus to help us win beer pong
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
Sangria Flip Cup was probably one of our worse drunken decisions
Seriously, it's 5am. STOP CREEPIN and START SLEEPIN!
Nothing warms my heart more than the sight of a naked hockey player in my bed.
Randomize
