So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub. I was in it.
i realized my work ethic and productivity really improves if i masturbate on my lunch break.
I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
i have to go see a new gyno today. he's a male. i just took 3 shots of tequila. its almost like freshman year... drink alcohol, meet a strange man, let him play with my vagina.
last nights episode of shot friends brought to you by polish vodka and flamingo baseball. pickles cure hangovers.
Oh man. Realized I was high when I realized how long I'd been watching Roseanne
Ita all starting to make sense i need vodka like i need air
Yes. We drank 3/4 of a handle of vodka, fried and ate a 3lb package of bacon, I tackled the neighbors snowman, made snow angels in our underwear, and then fucked all night. Christmas success.
My homemade mace ate through its aluminum container. I make awesome mace.
I am just glad I was home to catch most of it, cause it smells BAD.
I'm not a scientist but that could be because it's homemade mace. That is however just a hypothesis
Did you cry?
I don't think so. I definitely lost my cool though
Yeah i think jesus would lose his cool in that situation
I'm not gonna lie, my internet creeping skills scare me. I'm like Liam Neeson in Taken
I lost my bra at his grandma's house so there's that.
Ugh. My life is a never ending cycle of bad decisions and taquitos.
He ate me out while I was wearing a canada goose parka and a dress hand crafted by a seamstress from yellowknife. I came while watching the northern lights. Most arctic orgasm ever.
Randomize
