There is so much to learn about oneself from autofill.
we did rock-paper-scissors to see who would find out if you had alcohol poisoning
We found you on the floor drooling you kept saying over and over how you were double jointed.
When you start quoting save the last dance you need to stop drinking
One reason I feel like garbage: Kraft single wine shots
Turns out I was the only one drinking. I broke one guy's bed and kicked another in the face. Then when an RA came by I shouted to let him in he's gonna find the vodka anyway. Great night
No one parties like Jon. He once stole a cops hat, ran like the wind, partied all night with it, and dropped it off at the station the next day with a box of donuts as an appology.
This may have to wait till tomorrow. I smoked so my back wouldn't hurt and I overshot relaxed by like 4 hits casually
You drunkenly hook up with 5 people in one night and suddenly everyone tries to party with you.
i just got banned from the m&m's website for trying to get poon slayer written on my custom order
I'm glad our friendship can withstand laughing mid-blowjob during the diarrhea scene in Dumb & Dumber.
Just took physics exam. I think this is one of those 'chuck it in the fuck-it bucket and become an art major' days
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
I knocked over his glass and he yelled "Oh no the boxed wine!" and slurped it off the coffee table. Then he showed me how to mix maple syrup, Jameson, and coffee. My family is better than your family.
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
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