Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
I think one day, after evolution kicks in, my sons will thank me for having a 3rd ball. That's how much sex I'm having.
Pretty sure I just became the first person ever to use the word "boner" in a wedding card...
I was just "that girl you seen blowing some dude outside when you drove by"
He's having sex with his gf again. Every thump of his bed against the wall is insulting to our one night stand.
That's the kind of break up sex that keeps couples together. Damn.
Some guy just drank alcohol from me shoe..I think he's had enough..
we broke the bed, curtan rods, a dresser drawer, and unless I didn't notice it before, we put a hole in the wall. This is why he and I have to fuck in motels.
Everybody needs breakup sex. You just happened to get yours from a dude who hasn't reached the point of breakup yet. No biggie.
I guess she was just worried I'd end up sleeping with you again
It's not too late to disappoint her you know...
All I know, is I had green sex and beer and got driven home. That's it.
I actually had to apologize for "being too aggressive about harry potter"
Did you leave it the depths of Magic Mike's favorite banana hammock?
Tell me again why we had to Facebook stalk your therapist?
My house exploded and with it all my pot went up in smoke.
Randomize
