Maybe i shouldn't have told him the key to getting in my pants was double vodka sodas and Nelly's song "grillz."
Even if you were sober, spitters are STILL quitters, end of story.
how can i incorporate a boy scout uniform into what i do tonight?
That fucking fat Asian kid that NOBODY invited is stuck in the dryer again
It's going to be great. We're a perfect team to break up marriages and happiness.
I don't remember anything other than how good it felt when I peed my pants.
AND OMG I HOPE YOU ARE GREAT WITH CHILD. COOK THAT BUN!
she vomitted in her champagne, said "fuck it, it's new years", and continued drinking.
Confidence is key. All I had to tell him is I'm drinking a bottle of wine and eating chocolate today to celebrate that I love myself. That's how you get a Valentine, my friend.
What if I told you that I had 160 ounces of cheap malt liquor in my backpack? Espn films 40 for 40s presents: Edward 40 hands. Our room. 11PM/10 central
They kept barging in on us saying random shit. At one point they came in yelling room service! and threw soda at us bruising my foot. Weirdest injury I have gotten during sex.
let me just inform you that suppository-ing xanax is glorious
everything in the house taste like gin even the water, friday nite was a success
danced like there was no tomorrow. surprise. there's a tomorrow
I could be writing so much lesbian porn right now but noooooo!
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