She wants her shit back. Clearly she missed the cheaters-get-their-shit-ritually-burned clause.
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
He was pretty wasted I guess, but the crippled guy threw the first punch it was awesome
Just did lines off your face, congrats on getting in the magazine bro
Also, drinking coors light. Fuck that. Fuck that in the fucking face.
Someone left their drag queen on my couch. On the plus side, he sure does know how to make a mean cup of coffee.
I have a friend that keeps saying he wants to go bear hunting. Thought I would say just walk down church street at night. What intersection is it?
antibiotics and champagne: breakfast of champions
Do you have any need for a scary clown mask?
Oh Julie took your pants off last night, I put your pajama bottoms on, and Rachel took your bra off. It takes a village.
You know what would make the espn body photos even better? If anyone knew who any of those fucking athletes were. That, and maybe not feature Gary Player.
he went down on me to a drake song and now i think i need a penicillin shot
He sent me a snap with the dog tongue filter. I might have to bench him.
We are taking a shrt nap on the sidewalk cme fine me if you want but dont wake me up
I'd rather plunge my eyes out than acknowledge being related to either of my brothers
Randomize
