dude i just figured out that the tostitos sign is two people eating chips and salsa. being high totally pays off sometimes
All I know is I woke up next to her beside the toilet
come back what if one of your parents walks in and im just sitting here eating a cheesesteak without you
that freshman chick we always see on the weekends walked into art class wearing a jaegermeister shirt and holding a monster, which she proceeded to shotgun with a pair of scissors. It sickens me to know I will never achieve her level
They should have to wear some identification that warns you to stay away. Like one of those cones dogs wear to keep them from biting stitches. CONE OF SHAME.
If you really wanted to hide the fact you were gay, you could have at least had the sense to not get drunk in the same bar as your bf.
You told me if you could get your shoes on, you deserved a coke and rum. We never made it to the party.
I can't. I think his penis is about to take out a restraining order against me.
Dude. Why is there a hamster in my pocket? WHAT THE FUCK WAS IN THAT JOINT
holy shit i just had sex in a phone booth i so feel young again
I'm shaved like a Brazilian hooker right now.
I have the flu.
I don't give a shit
I was totally pumped and so was my beard
I don't know if I'm more excited about sex or that I have an excuse to smoke a cigarette
I woke up naked and alone this morning. What a life
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
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